Campaign for Rotund Cricketers – CAMRUC

Hello from Dubai airport – quite possibly the arse-end of the world – where many overfed businessmen have been spotted. Which leads me onto Ramesh Powar, India’s round offspinner; how good it was to see him hustle up to the wicket in the second one-dayer at Bristol. And it’s equally pleasing to read Mike Atherton has also made note of Powar’s waistline.

“When Chawla was removed from the attack 15 overs later – 15 overs bowled in tandem with the magnificently rotund off-spinner Romesh Powar – England were 214 for five and defeat was inevitable.”

So let’s start a campaign for the rotund cricketer to make his sizeable presence known. And list your favourite fatties below. I’ll start with the predictable, Mike Gatting – but I also have tremendous respect for WG Grace who, towards the end of his career, appeared to be pregnant with triplets.

Yours?

Wot shd i get my girlfreinds 4 xmas?

I hope you’re impressed with my title: Wot shuld i get my girlfreinds 4 xmas? That’s my attempt at the language of the new world. If you’re gagging for more – and by that, I meant the language (innit), you dirty, filthy-minded individual – try and decipher the Kevin Pietersen Post. And yes, I’ve capitalised Post for this reason alone: over 1200 comments have been left by his “fans,” whose admirable delusions of hope hold no boundaries. Or fours. Or even sixes. And apologies for that last pun.

Anyway, the reason for this post – the last for a while I should imagine – is that someone arrived to this blog by searching the following phrase in Google: “brilliant christmas presents for girlfreinds

Quite aside from the fact they arrived, rather disappointingly for them, at a cricket blog – not to mention the misspooooling – I find it equally hilarious that anyone should be looking for “brilliant” xmas presents for their “girlfreinds” on the internet…

T’ra for now.