First Great Western bureaucracy

The level of bureaucracy in this country never ceases to amaze me. I made the grave error – a heinous crime – of jumping on a train today two hours earlier than the date printed on my ticket. I have done it dozens of times but, today, the knuckle-scraping tattooed numbskull demanded I get off at Taunton – else pay £50. I made a fuss, as you might imagine; the train was barely a third full: people were stretched out on seats half asleep. It was virtually empty. What difference will it make to anyone, other than to severely inconvenience me, by forcing me off the train?

I reluctantly agreed, to the pleasingly shocked faces of my fellow passengers who seemed as incredulous as I was, and departed in a flurry of foul language. My main reason for being so fed up was the previous journey which was full of drunks, three of whom were smoking. Now, as a smoker, I find this absolutely infuriating. If I abide by the law, so should everyone else. But none of the train staff did anything to stop them. Why weren’t they thrown off the train, like I was, and arrested?

On the same journey a group of asbos, clearly unable to communicate in anything more than primal grunts and gargling bleach or vodka, took up position a few seats down. They were your typical disgusting teenager – we’ve all seen it, and probably done it. Swearing, half-cooked and generally acting like complete losers. A pensioner, probably in her seventies, was shrinking back into her seat and was intimidated – understandable. I pointed this out to these oiks which calmed them down briefly, but they were drinking more and more and she eventually left to stand in the corridor at the back of the carriage in relative peace.

I pointed this out to the useless staff who just made an announcement over the tannoy – the gutless, spineless bureaucrats. There will no doubt be some pathetic rule to protect them that they’re not allowed to approach people they suspect as being drunk. So the passengers suffer in silence.

Pathetic state of affairs. But it does feel good to rant. First Great Western? Your service is abominable.

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