South Africa v Australia, 3rd Test, Johannesburg, 2nd day

The second day from Jo’burg. And it’s April 1! Therefore, I can say with the utmost sincerity that Ricky Ponting has retired; Merv Hughes is returning to cricket and will play for England; Wasim Akram is also returning. To captain India. And the ICC have removed the West Indies’ Test status and replaced them with Russia.

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